Jakey's Angels (season 10)

EPYSODE ONE:
"all right angels we've had a contract dispute with kathy so she has legally excommunicated herself from the angels" "i'm crying on the inside" "i'm partying on the inside" "so i figure we'll have a series of guest angels until we find the one that clicks with our audience" "oh boy that sounds like a good use of the expensive training facilities" "hey we bought a facility and only trained four women on it so excuse me if i want to get the most bang for my buck" "whatever anyway who's this week's angel" "angels, please welcome angel emelyn" "hello" "how do you feel" "pretty good thanks" "now angels this week's criminal masterminds are none other than the beggar and the chooser!!!" "aw fuck" "not the beggar and the chooser!!!" "they're holed up in an alleyway, begging and choosing change from passersby" "i can't believe they've teamed up" "united as one, beggars and choosers present a horrific threat to world security" "word" The Angels head out for the Angelmobile.

EPYSODE TWO:
"spare change please man spare change" "fine fine" A civilian reaches into his pocket for a couple of quarters, but then The Chooser steps out of the shadows. "no no no i choose THIS" The Chooser's hand leaps into the civilian's pocket near the speed of sound and rips out a fresh hundred dollar bill. "WHAT" "thanks man may god bless you" "STOP RIGHT THERE, VILLAINS" Grace corners hard in the Angelmobile, attempting to run over The Beggar and The Chooser, but misses The Beggar, and The Chooser chooses to leap out of the way. "oh god look at this guy" Emelyn leaps out of the Angelmobile. "he is so filthy!!! we can't arrest such a filthy man!!!" Emelyn begins to spray down The Beggar, and lathers him with soap. "thanks man may god bless you"
"all right the chooser it's time to choose to surrender" "nah i choose to eliminate you!!!" The Chooser darts in and clasps his hands around Gwendolyn's throat. Gwendolyn is unamused, and launches a punch to The Chooser's gut, sending him flying into the side of a dumpster. "i'm a vampire i don't need oxygen" "fuck i chose incorrectly" "you sure did" Grace slaps a pair of handcuffs on The Chooser. "i choose to go quietly" "smart"

EPYSODE THREE:
"oh hey angels you actually chose to arrest the criminals this time instead of killing them" "well i felt bad for them you know" "any man who lives in such filth would turn to crime; you can't judge him for that in those circumstances" "indeed" "now it's time for our studio audience to grade the performance of our guest angel!!! input your votes on your keypad now!!!" The audience votes with unrivaled intensity to show how they truly feel about Emelyn's performance as an Angel. "and your final score out of 10 is a resounding!!! 7.429!!!" "WHAT" "7.429 sounds pretty good" "a higher grade than i'd have given kathy" "oh come on that performance was totally an 8" "apparently not" "i demand a recount" "okay" Jakey begins to recount the votes. "oh sorry i did the calculations wrong; your actual score is 7.428" "WHAT"
THE END