AlphaBattle World Championships 2016

This year's AlphaBattle Championships will be held in Auburn, Maine, which is cited by many as the birthplace of the sport. The city has built a new sports dome for the occasion, and the 2016 AlphaBattle World Championships will be the first sporting event held in the new "Very Good Dome".

After being found "probably guilty maybe perhaps" of "being generally aware" of the possible removal of the letter "M" from the alphabet in last year's AlphaBattle semi-final match, four-time AlphaBattle world champion Tom Brady has been banned from the sport for life.
Brady is just the fifth person to ever be banned from the sport, after Shoe-Wearing Bill, Jakey, David Boogie, and Alabama's sweetheart, Hans.


This year, former AlphaBattle Councilman Gilbert Gottfried has retired to pursue a career in music. His replacement is champion AlphaBattler Cowlord the Wise.

Once again, the AlphaBattle field is full of sixteen contestants, all of whom are vying for the coveted championship award. Fifteen qualified by winning regional events, and the sixteenth listed is a wildcard entry, voted in by the AlphaBattle Council.
Rookies are marked with an asterisk.

Thom Yorke
Sheriff Antony
Stevo Fisher
J. Key*
Hip-Hop Horse*
Barack Obama
Tim Bradley*
Paul McCartney
Nicki Minaj*
Max Schoonen
Max Schoonen's ponytail
Will Smith
Charlie Sheen
A banana*
Hideo Kojima
Ainsley Harriott


With a total of five rookies (a number which hasn't been seen since the 1930s), this year's AlphaBattle World Championships will certainly be unpredictable.

who won