A Thing of the Past: Prehistory (65,000,000 BC)

Mission 050: And Arrest Me for My Mistakes [King Bran]
"i didn't think you'd get this far, but your journey ends here pangaean; i am sheriff antoinette, the last and best line of defense" "you'd have to be after those last three forts" "yeah those guys suck" "hey are you feeling all right" "uh yeah why" "you don't look so good; here check it out" Jakey passes Sheriff Antoinette a reflective rock, which shows her face being green and spotty. "OH NO" "you'd better get some rest" "y-yeah i better had" Sheriff Antoinette exits the fort, leaving Jakey to seize it with no resistance. "OH COME ON" "before you start, that was VERY convoluted; i needed to get that special rock, which could only be acquired deep within a haunted cave guarded by a spooky ghost; luckily the regular spooky ghost was sick and claire was there instead, so i was able to pass with little effort or terror, but in order to retrieve the rock, i had to wear special rock-plucking gloves, and the only pair i could find were owned by sophia, who wants to kill me, so i had to have victorrhea act all sick and pitiable and gloveless, but she collects gloves, so in order for her to be sure i'd give the gloves back to her when i was done, i had to leave behind some collateral, so i went home to grab my favourite rock, but it was locked inside the case and i forgot where i put the key, so i had to have amber pick the lock but she was out of lockpicks, so i had to get some from arabella, but she wanted some rocks in exchange and all my rocks were locked in the case, so i had to go to the rock depository to get a loan from ruth, who was asleep so i had to wake her up without angering her, so i needed to whip up her favourite recipe, which only violet knows, so i had to ask her, and she needed some ingredients, which only unimportant had, and she wanted a pterodactyl, but to get the pterodactyl, i had to find a herb that only grows on the snowy mountain, HOWEVER, to ascend the snowy mountain, i had to answer piper's riddles three and-" "WHAT HAPPENED TO THE FIRST PTERODACTYL SHE WANTED" "it was getting lonely and wanted a friend ANYWAY even though i'd answered the riddles three before i'd already forgotten the answers so i had to get back my answer book from the library, but it had been check out already by gwendolyn, who was willing to let me borrow it, but since library fees are outrageous, she needed collateral, so i went home to grab my favourite rock, but it was locked inside the case and i forgot where i put the key, so i had to have amber pick the lock but she was out of lockpicks, so i had to get some from-" "YOU'RE GOING AROUND IN CIRCLES" "hey now that you mention it i could have cut out a lot in the middle there but alas i did not; so anyway i had to get some lockpicks from alison, but she needed inspiration for her next work of art, so i had to go and get grace to help, but grace was guarding my body, and wouldn't leave unless someone she trusted would replace her temporarily, so i asked noriko, and she agreed, but she was waiting in line for a new model cleaning tool, so i had to take her place in line, except the guy in front of me got the last one, so i had to steal it from him and unfortunately it turned out to be my boss sheriff antony and he was upset so i had to frame my co-worker deputy orange by placing something that is distinctly his at the scene of the theft, but he keeps all his valuables locked inside a case and i couldn't find where he put the key, so i had to have amber pick the lock but she was out of lockpicks, so i had to get some from-" "I HATE YOU SO MUCH" "wow rude ANYWAY, i had to get some lockpicks from jasmine, but she was busy digging graves, so i snuck into her house to borrow some, but she keeps her lockpicks locked inside a case and i couldn't find where she put the key, so i had to have amber pick the lock but she was out of lockpicks, so i had to get some from-" "ARGH" King Stan storms off, more angry than anyone thought possible, grumbling to himself. "if only we'd had a fifth fort none of this would have happened" "wait no i was just getting to the best part!!!" Michelle plants a fourth Pangaean flag proudly in the fort. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/the fourth fort/'I just beat A Thing of the Past: Prehistory and all I got was this stupid' t-shirt/THE END]