Christmas Special 2013

CHRISTMAS SPECIAL AND SHIT:
"so what's on the agenda for today" "what? today i'm marrying christmas" "oh is it christmas already?" "i swear it comes multiple times in a year" "i know right" The wedding party hops into the limousine and ride to the courthouse.
"WE ARE GATHERED HERE TODAY TO WED THESE TWO IN HOLY MATRIMONY" "cool" "do you, jakey, take this tree to be your lawfully wedded bride" "totally" "and do you, tree, take this... guy? to be your lawfully wedded person" "..." "..." "..." "i'll take your silence as a yes" Jakey puts a star on top of the tree. "you may deflower the bride" Jakey grabs the tree and carries it into the broom closet, where he quickly deflowers it, then he returns to the courthouse proper. "IT'S TIME TO CUT THE MOTHERFUCKING CAKE" Jakey and the tree grab the knife and carefully cut into A HARLEQUIN FOETUS KNIGHT
Sheriff Antony twirls his revolvers. "heh" Bran launches the harlequin foetus knight into the air, and Sheriff Antony shoots it with his revolvers. Taylor leaps into the air and impales the harlequin foetus knight. Taylor leaps off, and Tony runs at the harlequin foetus knight, sword dragging across the floor, and releases it into a deadly spiral of energy. The harlequin foetus knight is launched into the air, and Michelle leaps at it and kicks it at a wall. Amiee :3 makes pastry for Jakey and Eif as they play Strip Parcheesi. "so like" "yeah?" "what now" "well according to protocol, one of us has to get his/her powers now" "but i already have them" "play along you you not-very-cool guy" "TAKE THAT BACK" "okay yeah that was mean" "OKAY" Jakey runs around aimlessly and gets struck by a bolt of electricity. Electricity shoots from Jakey's left hand and obliterates the harlequin foetus knight. "wow nice job jakey" "yeah you're pretty cool" "you mean it?!" "no" "fuck"