Pokémon TruthWhite 2 and FalsehoodBlack 2

Be sure to first read the other entires in the Pokémon series posted above this one in the navigation menu.

CHAPTOUR ONE:
"hey there rosa how would you like to get your very own pokémon from professor juniper?!" "are we moving to a different region?" "no it will be a proud unovan pokémon" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that"
"FINE WHATEVER" "good!!! and how would you like to get your very own pokédex?!" "sounds like the catalyst for nothing but busywork" "so is that a yes?" "that's a no" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that" "pass" "don't be like that"

CHAPTOUR TWO:
"rosa i hear you're getting your own pokémon good now you can help me search for my sister's purrloin" "no thanks" "come, we have no time to lose" Hugh drags Rosa up to the vista. "hello hello i am bianca here with your options for starter pokémon" "wait what could professor juniper not make it out here herself? am i not good enough for her? does she think i'm a nigger or some other lowly lifeform not worthy of her presence?" "just pick a pokémon" "fine" Rosa peruses the Pokémon selection and is immediately repulsed. "what the fuck is that ugly thing with the white face?!" "oh you want this one? okay here you go bye" Bianca quickly shoves the ugly one into Rosa's hands and sprints off like a light. "WHAT THE FUCK" "the ugly one? good choice rosa; coincidentally, i have always had the starter that is super-effective to yours" "wait no i wanted the smug snake!!! COME BACK!!!" "now let us do battle rosa GO SMUGLEAF" A deep frown appears on Rosa's face. "go, the ugly one" After a shitshow of tackles, the ugly one defeats Smugleaf. "i hate you"

CHAPTOUR THREE:
Luckily, Rosa's hometown of Aspertia City is home to a brand new gym in the Unova region. Rosa enters, and is immediately greeted by a friendly voice. "YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING do you dare to dream big?! do you want to be the very best like NO ONE EVER WAS?!" "fine" "f-FINE?!" "i really don't care one way or the other" "it's always hard when the journey begins, but i am here to lend a hand!!! take my advice and we will soar to the top of the heap!!!" "lay it on me" "cheren uses normal-types" "um thanks" "hello trainer i look forward to a fair match GO PATRAT" "GO DEWOTT" "h-how do you have an evolved starter already?!" "i did not want anyone to see me with that ugly piece of shit; now he's presentable" "just take the damn badge"
"hello rosa and thank you for participating in the medal rally!!!" "the wha-" "here is a medal celebrating your accomplishments so far!!!" "how do you know what i've accomplished?! we've never met!!!" "don't be silly; i am always ALWAYS watching" Rosa nervously looks down at the medal in her hand. "WORE STRIPED PANTIES?!" "yes a very nice choice on your part" The Pokémon Center buzzes with excitement at Rosa's newest medal acquisition. "striped panties?! even i don't have that one!!!" "it's really hard when you live in a region without clothing stores to get the underwear-related medals" "maybe i should ask rosa if i can borrow her striped panties!!!" "oh great idea bro!!!" Rosa sprints out of the Pokémon Center, vowing never to return to Aspertia City.

CHAPTOUR FOUR:
"check out my major movie debut rosa!!!" Pop Roxie leads Rosa into the Pokéstar Studios theatre. "HA HA I, BRYCEN-MAN, am going to do illegal things!!!" "p-please don't" "VULLABY ATTACK" "noooooooo my riolu!!!" "THE END" Rosa stares at the screen in silence. "how much do they charge to get into one of these movies" "like five hundred bucks but man is it worth it"
"rosa check it out we wrote a movie script just for you" "oh cool let's roll it" "ACTION" "hey check out this time machine i invented" "oh nice WHOOPS MY GLASSES FELL INTO THE MACHINE" "well now the cavemen have some nice new glasses i suppose" "THE END" "what a great shoot rosa now for a celebratory snack" The direction attempts to pull off one of Rosa's buns. "ow stop" "sorry i thought those were donuts"
"good news rosa!!! your movie made for us one BILLION pokémon fun bux!!!" "what how" "the unova region only has two movies presently" "ah that would do it i suppose" "so i've started work on a new movie for you to be in; your sister grows GIGANTIC and-" "i don't do fetish porn" "aw come on hear me out"

CHAPTOUR FIVE:
Rosa enters the city's local club hoping to absorb the nightlife, but it is apparently also the city's gym. "YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING roxie uses poison-types" "ah no i'm not here for-" "YO GIRL WITH THE BUNS!!! ARE YOU READY TO ROCK?!" "fuck yeah i am" "THEN LET'S DO THIS!!! GO KOFFING!!!" Rosa slaps her face. "i just wanted to listen to the music" "it's called multi-tasking" "fine fine go dewott" The battle rages on and on, but Rosa eventually comes out on top. "THANK YOU!!! NOW FOR A SONG OFF OUR NEWEST ALBUM!!!" "PLAY FREEBIRD" "get out"

CHAPTOUR SIX:
"ROSA good there you are" "hugh i do not want to hear about your purugly-" "it's about my sister's purrloin; team plasma has been spotted in the sewers of castelia city; LET'S GO" "what no let go of me" Hugh drags Rosa by her wrist into the dank, odiferous sewers beneath Castelia City. "TEAM PLASMA WHERE IS MY SISTER'S PURRLOIN" "listen kid do you seriously expect a criminal organisation that steals thousands of pokémon each year to remember one specific instance of the most common non-shiny gutter trash pokémon we supposedly stole several years ago" "YES WHERE IS IT"
After the conclusion of her sewer adventures and afterward her bathing adventures, Rosa heads for the city's gym. "YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING burgh uses bug-types" "what's with all the cocoons" "enter one and soon you will emerge more beautiful than ever before" "then can i face the gym leader?" "yeah sure why not" Rosa reluctantly enters a cocoon, and is violently sucked upwards and around the entire room to Burgh's art den. "greetings challenger i hope-" Before Burgh can finish his sentence, Rosa vomits all over the painting he's been working on. "oh my OH MY OH MY!!! THIS IS PERFECT!!! THE COLOUR!!! THE SHADING!!! I AM TRULY INSPIRED!!! TAKE YOUR BADGE AND LEAVE ME TO PAINT!!! THANK YOU ROSALYN!!!" Burgh throws a badge at Rosa as she lies on the floor.

CHAPTOUR SEVEN:
Rosa wanders into the Desert Resort and finds a man in a suit. "hey there how's the standing around going" "y-you're the second person ever to speak to me here; i'm touched" "uh-" "here, take this soft sand as a way to remember this meeting" The man begins scooping sand into Rosa's clothes. "hey wait STOP"
"hello miss and welcome to join avenue!!! there's nothing here yet but there will be!!!" "uh cool" "i'm glad you like it!!! because starting today, YOU are our new manager!!!" "WHAT" "now what is your standard greeting when meeting new people" "fuck you" "fuck you?! sounds great!!! and what do you say when something really impresses you?" "you are a fucking weirdo" "I LIKE IT!!! now my assistants here will show you how to add shops to the avenue!!! ciao!!!" "wait wait-" "fuck you!!! what would you like us to call you as our boss" Rosa sighs and makes one last-ditch effort to get out of this. "nigger" "nigger?! sounds great!!! now see that kid there? i bet he wants to open a shop!!! go recruit him nigger" Rosa walks over to the passing kid. "would you like to open a shop here on our avenue" "yes; yes i would!!! my name is janus and it has always been my dream to open an antiques shop" "go crazy" "WOO" Janus builds the shop quickety split. "pit pat nigger come and check out my wares!!!" "p-pit pat?!" "if we get five more customers, our shop will gain a rank and you'll hear me say 'pit pat'" "joy"

CHAPTOUR EIGHT:
"hello and welcome to nimbasa city's famous small court" "a-are you playing basketball on grass?!" "uh yeah how else would we do it" "maybe on a hard surface so the ball bounces better?" "what no then we'd fall down and get nasty bruises!!!"
"YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING elesa's out right now riding the rollercoaster" "oh uh i get motion sickness so i'll just wait here" "elesa said she will not leave the roller coaster area until a challenger personally finds her at the back of the rollercoaster maze" "of course" Rosa trudges out to the rollercoasters, and fills every car with vomit on her way to meet Elesa. "oh challenger you just missed her; she returned to the gym" "OF COURSE"
"YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING elesa uses electric-types; walk down the runway and meet our stunning model trainers!!!" Rosa begins her walk down the runway, but is stopped by a fashion model. "halt trainer you must battle me to pass!!!" "what the fuck are you wearing" "this is the latest fashion made by our gym leader elesa!!!" "you look like a total freak" "you're one to talk with those stupid buns" "MY BUNS ARE CUTE AS HELL you're just jealous" "yeah sorry i went too far"

CHAPTOUR NINE:
"hello trainer i am elesa" "oh were you the one who sang 'let it go'" "no" "oh good i hated that movie" "i know right?! say, are you the girl i've heard so much about from the medals guy? the one with the striped panties?" Rosa sighs. "yes" "it is so nice to finally meet you; let's have a great battle GO EMOLGA" "GO SAMUROTT" "l-level fifty?!" "i got really lost in the desert" "just take the damn badge"
"ROSA GOOD YOU'RE HERE" "oh god" "you see these team plasma grunts?! they may know where my sister's purrloin is!!!" "do you even have a concept of how the human memory works? it may have been the most important day of your life, but to them, it was tuesday" "it was a wednesday" "whatever" Hugh drags Rosa over to the Team Plasma grunts. "TEAM PLASMA WHERE IS MY SISTER'S PURRLOIN" "kid do you have some kind of learning disability"

CHAPTOUR TEN:
"i'm a heartbreaker... my name... charles..." "uh cool can i get past you and your legion of future heartbreak victims" "not until you learn how to triple battle with me" "seriously?" "yeah it's vitally important" "no it's not; it's another shitty gimmick that will be forgotten next generation just like mega evolution and z-moves" "those haven't happened yet" "uh just like the safari zone and pokémon contests" "no way man; triple battles are eternal" "i don't even have three pokémon" "then go catch some moron; the tagline of the series isn't 'sweep the game with your starter', it's 'gotta catch 'em all'" Rosa trudges off, mumbling under her breath. Soon, Rosa returns with a freshly-caught Minccino and Gothita, under protest, and watches them get knocked out so Samurott can sweep Charles's team.
"hey man what's up" "shut up fucker you used to be cool but now you're all 'save the pokémon' when i just want to SWIPE AND STOMP the pokémon!!!" "uh dude-" "ALL RIGHT TEAM PLASMA WHERE IS IT?! I KNOW YOU KNOW!!!" "where's what" "MY SISTER'S PURRLOIN YOU FUCKERS!!! TELL ME EVERYTHING!!!" "dude-" "QUIT STALLING!!!" "FUCK i'm getting out of here!!!" The Team Plasma grunt runs away, leaving just the former Team Plasma grunt to accost Rosa. "oh it's such a sad tale the splintering of team plasma" "i don't care" "well you'd better at least pretend because the gym leader told me he won't show up until you specifically listen to our life story" "GODDAMMIT I JUST WANT TO BATTLE POKéMON"

CHAPTOUR ELEVEN:
"so basically what happened was we were stealing pokémon and stomping on them and having a great time but then someone told us that was a BAD thing to do and now we feel really bad about it" Just then, Hugh storms into the exposition hut. "YOU MOTHERFUCKERS WHERE IS MY SISTER'S PURRLOIN" "uh you'll have to be more specific; did it have any identifying marks?" "I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOUR GIBBERISH; GIVE ME MY SISTER'S PURRLOIN NOW" "ANYWAY, rosa was it? what's that short for? rosarade?" "rosalyn" "ah yes rosalyn would you please take care of this zorua for me" "oh it's so cute!!!" "it evolves into THIS" Rood holds up a picture of Zoroark. "oh wait um on second thought my party's full!!!" "you've only got three pokémon" "BETTER GO BACK TO THE POKéMON CENTER TO CLEAR SOME SPACE HA HA B R B!!!" Rosa runs off and never returns, leaving Rood to wonder why exactly he keeps showing people that picture.
"YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING clay uses ground-types OH and uh i heard you get motion sick so here's a big pack of dramamine" "oh thank y-wait does this mean what i think it means" "yeah the gym is a series of conveyor belts" Rosa sighs and takes her Dramamine. "hello trainer i am clay i hope we have a fair and excit-" Rosa violently throws up all over Clay. "WE GAVE YOU DRAMAMINE TO AVOID THIS EXACT SCENARIO!!! just take the damn badge"

CHAPTOUR TWELVE:
After finally getting through the long and winding Chargestone Cave to Mistralton City, Rosa falls to the ground and yells to the sky. "SMELL THAT AIR!!! COULDN'T YOU JUST DRINK IT LIKE-jet fuel?" "i wouldn't recommend drinking jet fuel" "PROFESSOR JUNIPER?! why the fuck did you send that blonde cunt to aspertia city instead of going yourself?!" "wait YOU'RE rosa?! man if i'd known you were white i'd have come to aspertia city myself" "WHAT MADE YOU THINK I WASN'T?!" "i thought you were named after that lady who rode the bus!!!" "oh that's fair i suppose" "here take this purple pokéball as an apology" "man think of all the one purrloin i could catch with this baby"
Rosa enters the gym, but her friend is nowhere to be found. As she looks for him, he crashes straight into her. "OW FUCK" "YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING skyla uses flying-types; also to get to her, you have to walk along this grating high above our heads and avoid getting blown off by giant fans!!!" "that sounds REALLY dangerous" "it has resulted in less fatalities than the previous design of the gym" "and what was that, dare i ask" "trainers shot themselves out of cannons without helmets, unless they brought their own from home, in which case, we would tease them mercilessly for it" "you know, hoenn's sixth gym is also a flying-type gym, but that one's just a bunch of turnstiles" "befitting a bunch of trumpet-playing pussies"
"hello trainer i am skyla; you have done well to brave the galeforce winds from my giant fans BUT NOW IS THE TIME FOR BATTLE!!! HAVE AT YOU!!! GO SWANNA" "GO SAMUROTT" "h-how is your starter already level 100?!" "how many months was i in chargestone cave for?" "just take the damn badge"

CHAPTOUR THIRTEEN:
After a long plane ride from Mistralton City, Rosa and Professor Juniper finally arrive in Lentimas Town. "so what are we doing here" "i'd like you to go to opelucid city" "we're further away from opelucid city than we were before the plane ride" "better start walking" Rosa throws her arms in the air and trudges off.
Rosa wanders and wanders, and eventually comes to a gate. Eight men are doing a can-can right in the middle of the path. "what are you doing" "today, we are dancing for no reason; someday, we will disappear for no reason" "you're blocking the path step aside i want to get to whatever is beyond this gate" "today, we are blocking the path for no reason" "MOVE i have heard conflicting rumours about the area beyond this gate; i must see for myself if it is some kind of forest or a city" "today, we are not letting anyone past for no reason" "move or i will make you move" "today, we are immovable for no reason" Rosa attempts to charge through the line of dancers, but is brutally kicked away from her intended destination. She attempts to use Samurott's moves, but they are also kicked away by the never-ending can-can.

CHAPTOUR FOURTEEN:
"YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING drayden uses dragon-types" "hello challenger i am drayden i hope to have a fair fight GO HAXORUS" "GO SAMUROTT" Rosa defeats Drayden easily with her overleveled Samurott. "congratulations rosalyn here is your badge; professor juniper told me to regale you with the history of the legendary dragon pokémon" "junie said that?! she must have had me mistaken with someone else; someone who cares" "it all started back in nineteen-aught-six, when we were writing up the script for world war one; we called it world war one as it had a built-in sequel hook; the studio wanted us to create a world war three, but we declined, as it was always meant to be a duology, and they didn't offer us enough money; so the studio started making knock-offs that didn't gain nearly the traction; the cold war series dragged its feet in the mud, and while it was promised to end in world war three, the studio shut down due to a lack of interest; assets from that scrapped film were later recycled into the vietnam war, which you may have heard of" "dear god make it stop" Just then, a loud crash is heard from outside. "thank you arceus"
Outside, Team Plasma is shooting freezing death rays out of their flying pirate ship. "this is the stupidest thing i've ever seen in my entire life" "HAND OVER THE DNA SPLICERS DRAYDEN" "NEVER!!! THEY WERE GIVEN TO ME BY FDR HIMSELF AFTER I LEAD THE UNOVA MEN'S VOLLEYBALL TEAM TO OLYMPIC GOLD!!!" "really? FDR? damn i want them even more now"
"okay gwendolyn-" "rosalyn" "whatever i'd like to show you these dna splicers that nixon gave me after i lead the unova men's synchronised swimming team to olympic silver" "YOINK" An edgy ninja man steals the DNA Splicers from Drayden's hands. "GET BACK HERE WITH THOSE!!! CLINTON GAVE ME THOSE AFTER I LEAD THE UNOVA MEN'S SKEE-BALL TEAM TO THE TOP 32 OF THE CHUCK E CHEESE LEADERBOARDS!!!"

CHAPTOUR FIFTEEN:
"YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING the gym leader here uses water-types" "uh what's his name" "um i forget; he's so forgettable that you'd think he was from johto" "hello challenger mon i an i be uh what be my name again mon? whatever GO JELLICENT AN TING" "GO SAMUROTT" After a quick curbstomp, Rosa earns herself her eighth and final badge. "welp i'm off to the pokémon league" "aren't you forgetting something?" "no i am intentionally ignoring it" "well uh until you foil their plans, a couple of team plasma grunts will be blocking your path to the pokémon league" "see, i don't get this; every evil team isn't defeated because of the heroine's sense of justice or whatever; they're defeated because they're in the fucking way; if they'd just step aside, the girls with the overleveled starters would simply leave them alone because we don't fucking care" "if it makes you feel better, you can think of them as undercover agents trying to force you to save the world" "that just makes me wish they'd sent some competent agents who could deal with the problems themselves instead of relying on teenage girls to do it"

CHAPTOUR SIXTEEN:
"maybe if i hide in this cave, people will stop bothering me" Just then, a loud crash is heard. "YO MON I AN I BE LOWERIN GANGPLANK ON BOMBACLOT PLASMA SHIP AN TING NOW BE GET IN DERE AN DO DE TING MON" "i have no idea what you just said" "ROSA!!! you have found team plasma's ship!!! NOW THEY WILL FINALLY GIVE BACK MY SISTER'S PURRLOIN!!! CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGE!!!!" Hugh grabs Rosa's wrist and charges headlong onto the Plasma Frigate. De gym leader stay behind an ting.
"psst hey i'm a spy here to help you" "DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT A PURRLOIN STOLEN FROM ASPERTIA CITY?!" "uh no?" "THEN GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY YOU USELESS RETARD" "okay i'm leaving fuck you all" "i'm coming with you" "oh no you're not" Hugh drags Rosa through the ship.
"BEHOLD!!! we are using the legendary pokémon kyurem to freeze the entire unova region!!!" "YEAH YEAH WHATEVER WHO CARES; TELL ME WHERE MY SISTER'S PURRLOIN IS" "you really don't understand the concept of scale or lack of sentiment do you" "QUIT STALLING AND TELL ME"

CHAPTOUR SEVENTEEN:
After being kicked off of Team Plasma's ship and being forced to play hide-and-seek with it, Rosa and Hugh return for round two. Begrudgingly, on Rosa's part. "TEAM PLASMA WHERE IS MY SISTER'S PURRLOIN" "ah yes that specific purrloin i remember it well here you go have it back" "YES EVERYONE DOUBTED ME BUT I GOT IT BACK" "HUGH GOT REWARDED FOR BEING A FUCKING RETARD?!" "seems that way" "that's it; i am going to BURN THIS SHIP TO THE GROUND" "i don't care what you do rosa; i've got what i came for"
"LITTLE GIRL you have gotten in the way of me, the villain, for far too long!!! i will now murder you!!! KYUREM ATTACK!!!" As Kyurem launches his ultimate Glaciate attack and Rosa prepares for the sweet release of death, her saviours come rushing in to destroy the icicles. "haha i knew YOU would show-wait what" Ghetsis is surprised to see that it was not some idiot riding a dragon, but rather a trio of horse-like Pokémon. "oh sick it seems like the legendary musketeer trio wants to be my friends; i knew that completely ignoring them earlier was a good idea" Samurott, Cobalion, Terrakion, and Virizion beat the shit out of Kyurem and Ghetsis's Pokémon. "i'm glad that's over; want to hop into those nice classic reds for me" The legendary horses do as they're told, and a fourth horse trots up, sad that it missed the action. Keldeo stares at Rosa, signalling that he wants to go with her. "uh WHOOSP MY PARTY'S FULL!!! SIX POKéMON!!! HA HA B R B" Rosa sprints out of the Giant Chasm, never to return.

CHAPTOUR EIGHTEEN:
After a long, boring trek through Victory Road, Rosa arrives at the Pokémon League. "YO CHAMP IN THE MAKING good luck" "thank you my friend; this one's for you" Rosa marches into the elite four chamber, and defeats Grimsley, Caitlin, Shauntal, and the black guy, then begins to ascend the stairs to the champion's chamber. "WHY ARE THERE SO MANY STAIRS" Eventually, after camping out over two nights, Rosa enters the champion's chamber. "MORE STAIRS?! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY" Rosa ascends the final set of stairs, after camping out an additional night indoors. "i wonder who the champion is; i bet it's that alder guy" "no it is me!!! iris!!!" "the best trainer in all unova is a little negro girl with stupid hair" "you're one to talk" "my hair isn't stupid it's great you're just jealous" "yeah sorry" Rosa's overleveled Samurott sweeps Iris's team without breaking a sweat.

HALL OF FAME:
Samurott (level 100)
Cobalion (level 45)
Terrakion (level 45)
Virizion (level 45)
Minccino (level 22)
Gothita (level 23)

CHAPTOUR NINETEEN:
"champion rosa!!! we have made a new movie script just for you!!!" "what is it this time" "we've finally overcome our writer's block and finished the brycen-man series!!!" "oh boy let's get started"
"A HA HA HA YOU WILL NEVER DEFEAT ME RIOLU-GIRL, NO MATTER HOW STRONG YOUR BONDS OR HOW STRIPED YOUR PANTIES" "WH-WHAT" His distraction plot worked; Brycen-Man swiftly defeats Riolu-Girl, setting up the climax of the movie. "now you are suspended above boiling oil!!! you will soon be cooked to a juicy, tender GOLDEN brown!!!" "RIOLU USE ENDURE!!!" Riolu is lowered into the oil, but endures the deep-fry. "WH-WHAT" Her distraction plot worked; Riolu-Girl swiftly defeats Brycen-Man, ending the movie. "oh great job rosa!!! i imported these striped panties from kalos and intend to sell them to movie-goers after the film!!!" "uh cool" "also could you wear all of them real quick for me?" "no" "come on be a pal" "NO" "i just need a little of your scent on them" "GO SAMUROTT" "uh nevermind; have a nice day rosa"
THE END