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 An essay response to Carrie Underwood

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Jakeyadventure
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PostSubject: An essay response to Carrie Underwood   Sat Feb 19, 2011 2:41 am

In the song "Before He Cheats" or whatever, some psycho bitch fucks up this dude's truck. As we know from country music, trucks are the lifeblood of the American male, along with freedom and bitching about 9/11.

Carrie says this man has "cheated" on her. However, there are several things wrong with this. First, they're not married, so there is no legal obligation for him to only sleep with her. Second, if there is no such documentation of "rules", how could he have cheated? Cheating is only applicable when there are rules in place; without these rules, there is nothing to decide what is and is not cheating.
Seeing as how verbal agreements can be skewed by either party, only written agreements can be counted.

In response to her illogical premise, Carrie keys this man's truck, pops his tires, and cuts open his leather seats. These objects were expensive, unless he bought them at some sort of country yard sale, but knowing the Americans' truck-loving ways, this is highly improbable.
How is this appropriate if there was no money involved in his "wrong-doings"? I doubt she'd spent any money on him, as it is custom for the male to shower his woman with gifts. In fact, I'm willing to bet my entire [non-existant] college fund that he spent far more on her than she did on him. Her "thanks" comes in the form of property damage and truck-abuse.
I am sure this man is a hard-working American with an American flag painted on his truck's front end, as is custom in America. Carrie ruined this man's American truck, its interior and exterior, and justifies it by saying what amounts to "well he didn't hurt me physically or financially in fact he helped me in the latter but i'm a psychotic bitch and i ruined his americamobile because i'm on sir period". This man's debt skyrockets due to one woman feeling entitled to something that is not actually hers, legally or otherwise.

In conclusion, them bitches be crazy.
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An essay response to Carrie Underwood
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