Jakey's Angels (season 6)

EPYSODE ONE:
"all right angels; we've got reports of a peaceful demonstration happening at burgundy square; your job is to make sure it remains peaceful and is not the work of THE DEMONSTRATOR (no relation to demonstratour)" "what are they demonstrating" "oh it's the new FANCY CHOP vegetable chopper" "oh shit i saw the infomercial for that; apparently it doesn't just chop vegetables; it can also chop the very fabric of time and space if the chopper wills it" "it is said that one fancy chop carved out the grand canyon; imagine what could be done with the four you get in the special tv offer!!!" "i wonder if the live demonstration will have a similar or maybe even BETTER offer" "really glad it's happening at night by the way" "all right MOVE OUT"

EPYSODE TWO:
"THIS MY FRIENDS IS THE FANCY CHOP VEGETABLE CHOPPER" "WE KNOW" "YOU'VE TOLD US" "WE HAVE OUR MONEY RAISED INTO THE AIR" "PLEASE ACCEPT OUR MONEY IN EXCHANGE FOR YOUR PRODUCT" "oh no looks like it is the demonstrator after all" "constantly demonstrating, never selling" "the worst part is that what he's doing isn't even technically illegal; it's just really annoying" "but it's so annoying that it incites people to commit crimes out of frustration" "we need to stop this guy" "i have a plan" Kathy whispers into the ears of the other two girls.

EPYSODE THREE:
"ATTENTION: EVERYONE WHO WANTS TO BUY A FANCY CHOP; COME OVER HERE TO PURCHASE YOUR FANCY CHOP RIGHT NOW" "YESSSS" The crowd runs over to the Angels' line. "WHAT NO" The Demonstrator stomps up to Kathy, who is eagerly accepting people's money. "YOU CAN'T SELL UNTIL I'M DONE DEMONSTRATING" "YOU'VE BEEN DEMONSTRATING FOR FIVE HOURS" "AND I'M NOT EVEN CLOSE TO CLOSE TO BEING DONE" "WE KNOW AND THAT'S THE WORST PART" Kathy continues to sell Fancy Chops as The Demonstrator's rage boils over. "NOW TO DEMONSTRATE HOW TO USE THE FANCY CHOP TO GET RID OF PESTS" The Demonstrator grabs Kathy and throws her into a gigantic Fancy Chop. "WITH ONE PRESS OF A BUTTON, THE ANNOYING WOMAN WILL BE CHOPPED INTO THOUSANDS OF PIECES" "is that our cue" "i forget; were we supposed to arrest him now or wait until AFTER kathy is brutally murdered" "hmmmmmm" Kathy gives the other two Angels the middle finger from inside the Fancy Chop while The Demonstrator climbs to the top. "i guess we should save her" "last time we let an angel die, jakey deducted the funeral costs from our paychecks" "r.i.p. claire, may you forever uh be a ghost" Grace and Gwendolyn swing into action, knocking The Demonstrator off the giant Fancy Chop. Gwendolyn slaps a pair of handcuffs on him while Grace heads around to rescue Kathy, who has already passed out due to a lack of oxygen. "is she dead?" "not yet" "oh good; check her pockets" Grace rifles through Kathy's pockets and pulls out six travel-size Kit-Kats. "oh boy" Gwendolyn and Grace snack on chocolate while dragging The Demonstrator and Kathy to the Angelmobile.
THE END