These are short stories about various characters in the A Thing games.
These are stories that don't fit the format of A Thing, but are related to it and not the RPGboots.
Thank you for
A Thing Gaiden #: character (year it takes place)
This will be edited later with supplemental information about each gaiden.
A Thing Gaiden 1:
This does NOT star the same Jakey as A Thing/Another Thing/etc., but rather his father. The "King Jakey" that is only ever seen upon the throne of Canada.
I was originally going to make this its own Thing, but I feel like the story I wanted to tell will fit better here. Also, I really didn't want to have to make up a new set of characters.
This takes place in 1983, when this Jakey was 23, much like how A Thing took place in 2013, when that Jakey was 23.
Gameplay is a rip-off of Uncharted (which itself is a rip-off of Tomb Raider) with one giant igloo to explore.
A Thing Gaiden 2:
I had a hard time deciding what year this should take place in. First it was 2014, then I realised I wanted her to have already met Jakey, so I made it 2015. THEN I realised I wanted her to have also already met Erin, so it's 2016. This makes it the most recent point in the A Thing timeline until A Thing 2017 comes out.
Because it's one person, there's less dialogue than usual. I hope it's not terrible.
Gameplay is the same as the RPGboots (which is a rip-off of Devil May Cry) with one giant underground dungeon to explore.
A Thing Gaiden 3:
Sophia is probably the least storied character of the ragtag group of misfits I call a cast. She has only appeared in Everything (which is less impressive that it would be if that weren't a proper noun), and only in around three missions.
However, I am turning her into a relevant character TODAY. This story explains what happened between The Next Big Thing and Everything, and comes up with a good excuse to retcon the fuck out of Amiee :3's career. I'm Marvel Comicsing the fuck out of this shit and you can't stop me.
Peter Parker is going to be born again from the womb of a giant spider and you are going to like it.
Gameplay is a rip-off of Hitman (the good ones) with a shitload of different ways to kill the target (and a large skyscraper you can climb the outside or inside of).
A Thing Gaiden 4:
Sheriff Antony is one of the most beloved characters. I don't need to qualify that with "in RPGboot/Thing canon" or "that I've created". If you're talking about characters, Sheriff Antony is one of the most beloved. He needs his own game, and I gave it to him.
Ever wondered what happened between Nothing and Anything? No? Oh well.
I always write Sheriff Antony's stories in Courier New, to give it the hardboiled detective look befitting such a man.
Gameplay is a rip-off of L.A. Noire with all of Alabama to explore. The game is entirely in black and white.
A Thing Gaiden 5:
This was just a dumb idea I had that I ran with. I like Shopkeepour a lot, and unlike most characters I stole, I actually have 50% ownership of him anyway.
This one takes place a few months before Another Thing.
Gameplay is a rip-off of Telltale's more recent games, but as a joke all the dialogue choices are the same.
A Thing Gaiden 6:
This whole thing was based around the tubal ligation/salt shaker joke. I regret nothing.
Gameplay is a rip-off of Hitman once again. Once the story is completed, you get the opportunity to pull additional pranks on the other three girls.
A Thing Gaiden 7:
Conceived a month ago, but I managed to get it done today. I'm glad I gave up and made it a trivial task instead of a grand one. The game takes place at about the same time as Everything.
As a note, the Chicagoan voice actors are the same as the normal ones, but holding their nose closed.
Gameplay is a rip-off of A Thing, but incredibly glitchy and broken for a joke.
A Thing Gaiden 8:
The Mayans predicted the world would end in 2012. The Great Cheryl, however, says otherwise.
Alternate dimensions are fun to write in spurts.
Gameplay is a rip-off of those non-games that are popular these days.
A Thing Gaiden 9:
LET'S JUST TAKE THE MOST MINOR CHARACTER AND GIVE HER HER OWN GAME
Teachour wasn't named such in her debut game, Anything, but, yes, it's the same person as the one who nearly died when Professor Eif flicked a cigarette at her.
Gameplay is a rip-off of Fire Emblem, where Teachour has to lead a bunch of randos to defeat the Injuns.
A Thing Gaiden 10:
The quickest turnaround on a Gaiden yet. Conceived last night, finished this afternoon.
It takes place before OOTT, as a note.
Gameplay is just button-mashing in order to resist.
King Bran Kart Racing:
A dumb idea that kind of got away from me. I like it.
The Parallel Universe Candice ending is canon, as I said.
Pre-emptive answer to your question:
Valerie gets an ending where she wishes for her eye back and Sophia doesn't because it doesn't bother Sophia. Valerie is embarrassed of it, but Sophia believes it helps her to get more assassination jobs because she looks more "hardened" and "grizzled".
A Thing Gaiden 11:
The first Gaiden I'd conceived was for Gwendolyn. It just took forever to get to.
The original idea was to put the whole Gwendolyn/butler in the 1500s as a time travel mission in Anything, but I couldn't put Jakey in the story without it becoming some awkward romance thing.
The next idea was to write a "she's been a vampire for a decade" story, but I couldn't think of one.
So I decided on a "how she became a vampire" story, and ho boy, it isn't funny in the slightest. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I TRY TO WRITE A HALFWAY SERIOUS STORY
I considered not even publishing this, since it's not at all in-style for me, but I like the canonical implications. I did wait to publish it until I got another Gaiden done so it wasn't front and centre, of course.
It's another Telltale adventure game where your choices mean absolutely NOTHING.
A Thing Gaiden 12:
dumb idea i had last night
it couldn't just be a mission in thing 2018 because naturally jakey would do it RIGHT AWAY
Gameplay is just like the A Thing series.
A Thing Gaiden 13:
A Thing Gaiden 14:
PRETENTIOUS WALKING SIMULATOR
A Thing Gaiden 15:
A Thing Gaiden 16:
King Bran was busy being king
Emelyn was busy cleaning up after the kinging
Gwendolyn couldn't be there because it was daytime
Julia was busy playing a show
Natalie was in America at the time
The Great Cheryl already knows all this shit
Resistance Leadour was resisting the urge to participate
A Thing Gaiden 11: Gwendolyn (1507)
A Thing Gaiden 1: King Jakey (1983)
A Thing Gaiden 6: Grace (2005)
A Thing Gaiden 4: Sheriff Antony (2006)
A Thing Gaiden 9: Teachour (2007)
A Thing Gaiden 8: The Great Cheryl (2012)
A Thing (2013)
One Thing Leads to Another (2013)
A Thing Gaiden 5: Shopkeepour (2014)
Another Thing (2014)
The Next Big Thing (2015)
A Thing Gaiden 3: Sophia (2015)
A Thing Gaiden 7: Blakey (2016)
A Thing Gaiden 2: Valerie (2016)
A Thing Gaiden 13: Post Lady Layla (2016)
A Thing Gaiden 10: Resistance Leadour (2017)
One of Those Things (2017)
A Thing Gaiden 12: Sara (2017)
A Thing Gaiden 15: Hanukkah Lady (2017)
King Bran Kart Racing (2018)
A Thing Gaiden 14: Claire Who is a Ghost (2018)
A Thing Gaiden 16: Fortune Tellour (2018)