ADVENTURE
better safe, then sorry
ADVENTURE
better safe, then sorry

ADVENTURE

STUDIES SHOW THAT ADVENTURE IS AMAZING FOR YOUR HEALTH
 
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 Anything (2007)

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Jakeyadventure
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Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:45 pm

Mission 050: Dead on Arrival [Claire Who is a Ghost]
"so uh claire i'm not sure how to ask this but like how did you uh die" "i haven't told you that story?! it's a really good one" "but you-" "i'm still here i didn't lose anything i really cared about" "uh-" "IT ALL STARTED one cool autumn day; the first day of school last year - the last day of my life" "i gathered that" "anyway i was waiting for the school bus when all of a sudden i saw a lucky penny lying face-up on the tar so i bent over to pick it up and BAM hit by the bus" "r-really?!" "nah i'm just fucking with you it was a serial killer" "A SERIAL KILLER?!" "you haven't heard of the claire killer? the guy who only ever killed girls named claire? because he felt the 'e' shouldn't be part of the name?" "that doesn't ring a bell" "it was all over the news" "d-did they ever find him" "nah and that's why i'm still tied to this earth; i'm supposed to find my killer but i'm enjoying death far more this way" "all's well that ends well?" "indeed, except maybe for all those other claires he has killed and will kill in the future, but whatever" Michelle walks down the street and spots a lucky penny. She bends over to pick it up, and is hit by a bus. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/school bus t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:45 pm

Mission 051: Rise Over Shadow Mountains Blazing with Power [Sheriff Antony]
"jakey we've got to bust this gang of u2-loving criminals, and the time is right" "but it's only-" "listen i know these things okay i've been around the block a few thousand times" "o-okay" "i've found their hideout and we will now go there, learn something earth-shattering, and call it a day" "all right" Jakey hops onto his tricycle and Sheriff Antony follows on his horse. "okay you go in through the open window there and i'll enter through the ventilation system" "sounds good" Jakey hops into the open window and hides behind some crates. "we are here to induct our newest member, bonofan100" "hello hello" "hello bonofan100" "it's a beautiful day" Bonofan001 nods. "don't let it get away" Bonofan001 returns to the crowd. "as you can see, i am no longer bonofan01, but rather bonofan001; this means we have achieved our goal of 100 members and can enact our plan" Bonofan001 pulls down a curtain with his plan on it, but it is facing the wrong way for Jakey to see. "aw man" "our plan is simple and from this curtain it needs no explaining, as it is very simple" "simple but elegant and perfect" "just like bono himself" The Bonofans clear out of the room, taking their curtain with them. "JAKEY DID YOU SEE THAT" "n-" "I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT I JUST SAW ON THAT CURTAIN THEIR PLAN I MEAN" "i-" "NO TIME TO WASTE WE MUST PREPARE" Sheriff Antony runs off before Jakey can utter another sound. Michelle stands across the room, mouth agape. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/century jacket]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:45 pm

Mission 052: Maiden Alabama [Emelyn]
"jakey the king bran wants us to go and get him a missile defense turret, as he is worried about a possible invasion" "wait is that a turret that defends USING missiles or a turret that defends AGAINST missiles" "uh" Emelyn begins to sweat profusely. "I JUST WANT TO BE A GOOD SERVANT TO OUR KING BUT NOTHING IS EVER SIMPLE" "i know the feeling, trust me" "wh-what do you think he wants" "why not just get both" "i wouldn't have thought of that" Jakey and Emelyn head down to Missile Defense Turretz Я Us, where Taylor stands behind the counter chewing a stick of Trident sugar-free chewing gum. "yo we'd like two missile defense turrets" "is that a turret that-" "BOTH" "or you could always get the two-in-one" "YES THAT ONE OF THOSE" "twice the effectiveness for only thrice the price" Jakey hands Taylor the money from the royal treasury, and he and Emelyn haul the turret back to the castle. "yo king bran we got your turret for you" "nice that looks like it could do/prevent a lot of damage" "totally" "let's give it a test fire" Jakey loads the turret, and King Bran presses the fire button, launching seven missiles and Michelle straight into the side of Burger King. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/King Bran missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:45 pm

Mission 053: Invaders, Pillaging [King Bran]
"all right with our new missile defense system nothing could possibly-" The wall to the right of Jakey and King Bran explodes. "EEP" King Bran dives behind his throne into the shelter, sealing the door behind him. "it's a beautiful day" "don't let it get away" "i wasn't expecting this" "it is our sworn duty to end tyranny and free the people, as our lord and saviour bono has decreed" "uh-" "would you stand in our way" "i-uh yes?" "then i'm sorry for what i must do" Bonofan001 points a disintegrator ray at Jakey and disintegrates him. Luckily, the Moisannite reintegrates him once the Bonofans are turned away. "jesus fuck" Michelle is thrown off the throne by Bonofan001. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan001 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:45 pm

Mission 054: The Heart is a Bloom [Bonofan001]
"yo bonofan001 could you please stop staging your coup i rather like the government the way it is" "no but thanks for being polite about it; since you're such a nice guy though i'll give you a chance; get 22 of us to leave the castle in 22 different ways and we'll all leave peacefully" "DEAL" Jakey thinks for a moment. "couldn't you not exit the castle now please" "um... yes?" "all right you agreed now go" "oh dammit" Bonofan001 walks off, dejected, and bumps into Michelle, who is crying on the stoop. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/politeness award appears at safehouses/Bonofan002 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:45 pm

Mission 055: Shoots Up Through the Stony Ground [Bonofan002]
"all right second up: i've got to get physical" Jakey rolls up his sleeves and bounces around as a hyperactive boxer would. "cute" Bonofan002 fires his gun at Jakey, but Jakey heals instantly. "damn you're good" "thanks i know" Jakey delivers a hard haymaker to Bonofan002's skull, knocking him out cold and making him bleed profusely. The medics come in and cart Bonofan002 out of the castle. Michelle bounces around and hits Bonofan044 with a hard right jab, then runs away quickly. "TAKE ME HOME"
[reward: respect +/boxing gloves/Bonofan003 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:45 pm

Mission 056: There's No Room [Bonofan003]
"yo bonofan003 check out this delicious slice of pizza doesn't it make you hungry" "y-yes" "well it's only available at king pizzioli's pizza castle" "i-i'm strong i don't need it" Jakey licks the surface of his slice of pizza, and chews it loudly, making noises akin to those made during orgasm. "so good" "i don't need it i don't need it i don't need it i definitely don't need it" Jakey finishes his slice of pizza and licks his fingers, then goes in for the final slice of pizza. "I NEED IT" Bonofan003 crashes through the gate of the castle and runs down to get some pizza. Michelle exits the castle's kitchen eating a slice of pizza. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/King Pizzioli's Pizza Castle t-shirt/Bonofan004 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:45 pm

Mission 057: No Space to Rent in This Town [Bonofan004]
"yo kathy listen to what bonofan004 said; he said you're FAT and UGLY and a POOR BUSINESSWOMAN" "I AM NONE OF THOSE THINGS; HE HAS HURT MY FEELINGS" Kathy prints a scathing article about Bonofan004, causing all her fans to storm the castle and drag him out of the castle, where they tear him apart. Michelle walks inside with Bonofan004's left lung. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/signed Kathy t-shirt/Bonofan005 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:46 pm

Mission 058: You're Out of Luck [Bonofan005]
Jakey pulls out his gun and shoots Bonofan005 in the head, then dumps his body in the incinerator. "2ez" Michelle crawls out of the incinerator, no worse for wear. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/2ez jacket/Bonofan006 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:46 pm

Mission 059: And the Reason That You Had to Care [Bonofan006]
"HELP HELP ME I'M IN TROUBLE OUTSIDE OF THE CASTLE" "someone's in trouble!!!" Bonofan006 springs into action, leaving the castle to help whomever called for his help. "thanks for your help bro" Jakey pats Bonofan006 on the shoulder and turns his attention to Michelle, bleeding on the sidewalk. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan007 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:46 pm

Mission 060: The Traffic is Stuck [Bonofan007]
"BEEP BEEP" Jakey (illegally) drives a Super GT through the front gate of the castle, grabs Bonofan007, hucks him in the trunk, and drives him out to a deserted parking lot, letting him run free and be with the rest of his kind. "man this driving thing is easy" Jakey turns around to see peelouts, burnouts, wrecked cars and buildings, broken light posts, dead food vendors, and Michelle. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Jakey's very own Super GT/Bonofan008 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:46 pm

Mission 061: And You're Not Moving Anywhere [Bonofan008]
Jakey sneaks up behind Bonofan008 and stealthily places a pair of headphones on him, cranking up the sounds of a Nickelback album he found in the garbage (and only handled with five pairs of gloves) on his walkman. "sorry old buddy; we had some good times but sacrifices must be made" Jakey presses play, starting the track. "I'M THROUGH WITH STANDIN IN LINE AT CLUBS I'LL-" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA GET IT AWAY GET IT AWAY" Bonofan008 sprints away and crashes through the wall of the castle. Jakey wraps his walkman in lace and places a single rose on top of it. Jakey then lights a match and cremates his dear walkman, thankful for its sacrifice. "HE WAS SO YOUNG" Michelle cries on Jakey's shoulder. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/framed Walkman tribute appears at safehouses/Bonofan009 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:46 pm

Mission 062: You Thought You'd Found a Friend [Bonofan009]
Jakey sneaks up behind Bonofan009 and stealthily places some illegal contraband in his back pocket. "THAT'S THE GUY" The Police march up to Bonofan009. "search him" Andy Summers pats down Bonofan009 and finds a tiny Roman helmet in his pocket. "OKAY BUDDY WE'RE PUTTING YOU AWAY FOR A LONG TIME" Andy Summers slaps a pair of handcuffs on Bonofan009 and marches him down to the station. Michelle jumps out of Stewart Copeland's clutches and runs out of Jakey, still handcuffed. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan010 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:46 pm

Mission 063: To Take You Out of This Place [Bonofan010]
"yo the great cheryl there's a guy here says he's your biggest fan and he's always wanted to meet you and will pay a lot of money to do so" "oh cool let me teleport him in" The Great Cheryl waves her magic wand and teleports Bonofan010 to her. In his place appears Michelle. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/The Great Cheryl t-shirt/Bonofan011 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:46 pm

Mission 064: Someone You Could Lend a Hand [Bonofan011]
"hey bonofan011 do you smell something burning" "actually i-OH SHIT I LEFT THE OVEN ON" Bonofan011 races out of the castle to turn off his oven, but is too late, because his house has already burnt down, killing his family, pets, and Michelle. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan012 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:46 pm

Mission 065: In Return for Grace [Bonofan012]
"okay send in the decoy" Grace sets up the Jakey decoy, and both the decoy and Jakey walk at Bonofan012. "damn i need to get my eyes checked; i'm seeing double" Bonofan012 heads off for the eye doctor. Michelle walks up to the decoy. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan013 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:46 pm

Mission 066: You're on the Road [Bonofan013]
"JAMES COLE SMITHERSON YOU STOP THAT THIS INSTANT" "mother i told you my name is bonofan013 now" "NO IT IS NOT YOU UNGRATEFUL SHIT YOU'RE NAMED AFTER MY GRANDFATHER AND I WILL NOT HAVE YOU BESMIRCH HIS NAME BY JOINING SOME CULT" "i never asked to be named after your stupid grandfather who is also dumb" "OH THAT IS IT" Bonofan013's mummy drags him away from the castle, kicking and screaming. Michelle's mummy drags her away from the castle, kicking and screaming. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan014 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:47 pm

Mission 067: But You've Got No Destination [Bonofan014]
"all right a little more a little more PERFECT" Candice lowers the arm of the crane and lifts Bonofan014 out of the castle and sets him down in the parking lot next to Michelle. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan015 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:47 pm

Mission 068: You're in the Mud [Bonofan015]
"excuse me" "oh right" Bonofan015 takes a step back as Emelyn sweeps the area he was standing on. "excuse me" "oh right" Bonofan015 takes a step back as Emelyn sweeps the area he was standing on. "excuse me" "oh right" Bonofan015 takes a step back as Emelyn sweeps the area he was standing on. "excuse me" "oh right" Bonofan015 takes a step back as Emelyn sweeps the area he was standing on. "excuse me" "oh right" Bonofan015 takes a step back as Emelyn sweeps the area he was standing on. "excuse me" "oh right" Bonofan015 takes a step back as Emelyn sweeps the area he was standing on. "excuse me" "oh right" Bonofan015 takes a step back as Emelyn sweeps the area he was standing on. "excuse me" "oh right" Bonofan015 takes a step back out of the castle. Michelle struts into the castle, covered in dust and dirt. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan016 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:47 pm

Mission 069: In the Maze of Her Imagination [Bonofan016]
"OoOoOoOoOoOoO bOnOfAn016 i HaVe CoMe To HaUnT yOu FoR tHe CrImEs YoU hAvE cOmMiTtEd" "I DIDN'T MEAN TO STEAL THOSE TWINKIES FROM THE STORE BUT THEY JUST LOOKED SO DELICIOUS" "ThAt Is No ExCuSe FoR wHaT yOu HaVe DoNe; NoW yOu WiLl SuFfEr" "NO PLEASE NO" Bonofan016 runs out of the castle, screaming his head off. Claire winks at Jakey and vanishes into nothing, with Michelle appearing in her place. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan017 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:47 pm

Mission 070: You Love This Town [Bonofan017]
"CONGRATULATION, BONOFAN017, YOU'VE WON OUR GRAND PRIZE" "oh boy i love prizes" "COME OUT ONTO THE STREET TO ACCEPT YOUR PRIZE" "oh boy oh boy" Bonofan017 exits the castle and finds Brucie, standing next to a pile of junk. "ONLY THE FINEST WHATSITS AND WHOSITS FOR YOU MY FRIEND" "this is the happiest day of my life" Michelle emerges from the pile of junk. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan018 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

Anything (2007) - Page 3 Empty
PostSubject: Re: Anything (2007)   Anything (2007) - Page 3 Icon_minitimeSun Jul 31, 2016 4:47 pm

Mission 071: Even if That Doesn't Ring True [Bonofan018]
"all right set aim GO" Crazy Svart sets his vacuum on maximum power and points it at Bonofan018, who is sucked straight into the bag. "SHOP AT CRAZY SVART'S USED VACUUMS EVERYBODY" Crazy Svart bows and leaves the castle with his vacuum before emptying out the bag of its contents; Bonofan018 and Michelle. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan019 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

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Mission 072: You've Been All Over [Bonofan019]
"all right boys BREAK" Jakey sits back and watches as his loyal crew sets to work. "ARRRRRRGH WE BE HERE TO STEAL YOUR TREASURE MATEYS" "we don't have any-" "ARRRRGH WHAT BE A GREATER TREASURE THAN LIFE ITSELF" Magentabeard grabs Bonofan019 and drags him outside, placing him in the soul-sucking machine. "uh dudes mission accomplished we don't need his soul" "arrrrrrgh but i be likin' the soul-suckin' machine cap'n" "there'll be more souls later" "arrrrrgh fine" Magentabeard lets Bonofan019 go, and Michelle hops into his place. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan020 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

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Mission 073: And It's Been All Over You [Bonofan020]
"sir you've had too much to drink i'll have to escort you off the premises" "but i haven't-" Deputy Orange shoves a breathalyser into Bonofan020's mouth, which reads "fucking WASTED". "the breathalyser never lies" Deputy Orange drags Bonofan020 out of the castle and chucks him onto the sidewalk, then dusts off his hands. Michelle joins him, and begins dusting off her own hands. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan021 missions]
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Jakeyadventure
TO SEE A MARCHING BAND
Jakeyadventure


Male
Number of posts : 13790
Age : 30
Registration date : 2007-12-29

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Mission 074: It's a Beautiful Day [Bonofan021]
"hey bonofan021 can i get a picture to commemorate such a historic day in uh history" "oh definitely; be sure to get my good side" Jakey points his camera at Bonofan021. "eh the light's not so good here can you take a few steps back" Bonofan021 does just that. "this good?" "a few more" Bonofan021 takes a few more steps back, outside the threshold of the castle. "perfect" Jakey snaps the picture the moment that Bonofan021 realises what's happened. "what a great picture" Jakey shakes the polaroid and sees Bonofan021's priceless expression, as well as Michelle's. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bonofan022 missions]
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