Brucie kicked a rock into the side of a building, unhappy at having to find a new game to play. Then, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a menacing figure approaching him, which he immediately recognised as A HARLEQUIN FOETUS KNIGHT "HELP HELP IT'S REALLY A REAL HARLEQUIN FOETUS KNIGHT"
But no one came to help. Sheriff Antony did not twirl his revolvers and laugh under his breath. Bran did not launch the harlequin foetus knight skyward for Sheriff Antony to shoot like skeet. Taylor did not leap into the air to impale the beast. Tony did not charge the beast, unleashing his sword's energy into a terrible spiral. Michelle did not kick it into a wall. Jakey and Eif did play Strip Hopscotch, but that was their standard evening ritual. No one got struck by magical energy and gained powers. No one cared as Brucie was devoured by harlequin foetus knights. His parents enjoyed the life insurance payout, and used it to fulfill all the dreams they'd had, but been unable to accomplish since having a child. Life for the citizens of the town was 100% improved, all around.