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HEY MISTER CAN WE HAVE OUR BALL BACK

ADVENTURE

HEY MISTER CAN WE HAVE OUR BALL BACK
 
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 Nothing (2006)

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Jakeyadventure
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Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:21 pm

Mission 100: HAM Radio [Harvey Kinkle]
"jakey i am preparing my ham for this year's ham contest" "but you won last year's ham contest" "yes, i need to defend my title" "but you can't" "what yes i can" "no when you get to the gate the gateman will tell you that you won last year and are not allowed back this year" "aw man" Harvey chucks his ham in the garbage in defeat. Michelle rises from the garbage can. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/ham t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:21 pm

Mission 101: Carnivorous [Harvey Kinkle]
"jakey the carnival is in town let's go to the carnival" "YES" Harvey hops into the basket of Jakey's tricycle, and Jakey pedals to the carnival. "oh no they're closed" "That's Right Kids I Have Shut This Carnival Down" "what why" "Because The Fun House Was Not Very Fun" "what who gave you the right to decide what is and is not fun" "I Am The Official Alabama Fun Inspector; I Was The One Who Decided That 'Fun Size' Candy Bars Needed To Be Renamed Because They Are Actually Less Fun Than Their Full-Size Counterparts" "despite your amazing judgement in the past, your present judgement is A LOAD OF SHIT you know probably" "Go In There Right Now And If You Can Honestly Tell Me That It Was Fun, I Will Reopen The Carnival" Jakey rushes into the fun house, and the exit slips away behind him. "wha-what" Jakey runs around in the dark, bumping into walls which seem to get closer by the second. Soon, the walls crush Jakey, who pops and reappears beside Robert Truckdriver 40. "Well" "i think i am scarred for life" "There We Go" Robert Truckdriver 40 calls in the wrecking ball, which demolishes the carnival. Michelle hops out of the wrecking ball. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/a crippling fear of fun]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:22 pm

Mission 102: I Want to Get Away [Harvey Kinkle]
"jakey my mother has a rare disease that i cannot pronounce the name of and i must travel to the imposing jungles of france to get the cure, then synthesise it with native shamans" "how long will that take" "about nine years or so" "damn" Harvey grabs his suitcase and climbs the ramp to board the plane. "promise me that you will come back" "i... can't" A single tear streams down Harvey's face as he enters the plane to meet his destiny. Jakey watches as the plane takes off, a single tear streaming down his cheek. Michelle falls from the plane's cargo hold onto Jakey. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/suitcase t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:22 pm

Mission 103: So, Baby, Dry Your Eyes [Deputy Orange]
"jakey i have been having bad dreams lately and would like to stop having those" "have you tried not sleeping again ever" "yes and it didn't work too well luckily professor eif lent me this machine that lets someone invade my dreams and stop them from being bad" "sounds good" Deputy Orange crawls into bed and stares at Jakey expectantly. "i do not think i can enter your dreams until you fall asleep" "i can't fall asleep if you don't read me a bedtime story!!!" "oh right" Jakey settles down and reads Deputy Orange's favourite bedtime story, A Bear Named Pierre. Deputy Orange falls asleep as the last line hits his ears, and Jakey hops into his dream. "I'M NAKED AT SCHOOL AND GIRLS ARE LAUGHING AT MY MODERATELY-SIZED PENIS" "hmm have you tried putting on clothes to solve this problem" "... oh gosh why didn't i think of that" Deputy Orange puts on his uniform and sits back in his seat, eager to learn. Michelle crawls out of Deputy Orange's backpack. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/A Bear Named Pierre jacket]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:22 pm

Mission 104: Save All the Tears You've Cried [Deputy Orange]
"jakey thank you for fixing my bad dream problem but now i am experiencing a different bad dream" "hmm maybe you just aren't cut out for sleeping" "let's try once more before trying something silly" "fine" Deputy Orange settles into bed, and Jakey reads him his second-favourite bedtime story, 2 Bear 2 Pierre. Deputy Orange falls asleep swiftly, and Jakey dives into his dream. "DEPUTY ORANGE YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE DISAPPOINTED IN YOU" "but why" "I WANTED A SON" "but i am a son" "could have fooled me" A single tear streams down Deputy Orange's cheek. "i can't believe i don't have any ointment to apply after that SICK BURN" "oh i have some" "oh thanks jakey" Deputy Orange applies the ointment to his burn. Michelle plops out of the ointment tube. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/ointment t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:22 pm

Mission 105: Oh, That's What Dreams are Made Of [Deputy Orange]
"jakey all of my bad dreams are gone thanks to you and professor eif's machine; we should go thank professor eif for it by invading his dreams" "sounds good" Deputy Orange hops into the basket of Jakey's tricycle, and Jakey pedals to Professor Eif's lab. The two use Professor Eif's machine to hop into his dream. "oh yes ladies i am just as muscular + smart + handsome as you would assume by looking at me" "oh professor eif" Kathy faints. "which of you ladies would like to go home with me and copulate" "ooh me me me" "yes let us go" Professor Eif takes Michelle on his arm. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Professor Eif missions]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:22 pm

Mission 106: I've Got Another Confession to Make [Professor Eif]
"hey professor eif can i use your bathroom" "well i don't have anything against it but the guard has the only key, and he doesn't give it out to just anybody" Professor Eif points at a large, imposing guard. "gulp" Jakey walks over to the guard. "yo dog can i use the bathroom" "no" "rats" Michelle exits the bathroom and gives the guard back the key. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bathroom Guard missions]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:22 pm

Mission 107: I'm Your Fool [Bathroom Guard]
"hey guard man would you like an autograph" "oh yes please i am huge fan of... whatever it is you do" Jakey signs an autograph card for the guard. "sweet; ebay here i come" "can i use the bathroom now" "nah" "SHIT" Michelle emerges from a stack of tirelessly signed autograph cards. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Jakey's autograph t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:22 pm

Mission 108: Everyone's Got Their Chains to Break [Bathroom Guard]
"would you let me into the bathroom for this shiny nickel" "nop" "how about a shiny dime" "the dime is smaller than the nickel which really makes no sense and irritates me" "how about a shiny quarter" "no" "rats that's all the money i have" Jakey bats at the HUD to try to get his money count away. Michelle falls out of his weapons icon. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/$0.40]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:22 pm

Mission 109: Holdin' You [Bathroom Guard]
"i did not want to do this but you have forced my hand; if you do not let me into the bathroom i will release these embarassing photographs of you from the hanukkah party" "that's not me" Jakey looks at the guard, then down to his photographs. "shit you're right" Jakey tucks the photographs into his pocket to blackmail Deputy Orange with later. Michelle crawls out of Jakey's pocket. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/embarassing photographs of Deputy Orange at the Hanukkah party]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:23 pm

Mission 110: Were You Born to Resist or be Abused? [Bathroom Guard]
"i wish it didn't have to come to this" Jakey charges into the guard and stabs him with his hanzo steel katana, folded 1,000 times in the fires of Hell by Japanese artisans. "no no no no your technique is all wrong; you need to trust with your arm not just run into someone" "oh i guess i still need more training" Jakey returns to the dojo to train in the art of swordsmanship. Michelle bows in front of their sensei. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/katana]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:23 pm

Mission 111: Are You Gone and onto Someone New? [Bathroom Guard]
"the bathroom guard cannot guard the bathroom if i BURN IT DOWN AHAHAHAHA" Jakey pours gasoline all over the entrance to the bathroom, and tosses a lit match onto it. Kathy glances over and notices the fire. "hello 999 our building is like... on fire or something?" Sirens blaze as firemen hop out of the firetruck and douse the raging inferno. "here is our bill" The fireman hands Jakey a bill. "I DON'T HAVE THIS KIND OF MONEY" Jakey swats at his HUD again. "get it to us soon or we'll break your legs" Michelle crawls out of her fireman suit. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/fireman outfit]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:23 pm

Mission 112: I Needed Somewhere to Hang My Head Without Your Noose [Bathroom Guard]
"hey bro you totally SHOULDN'T let me use the bathroom" "okay" "DAMN YOU AND YOUR CUNNING" Jakey bashes his head against a wall repeatedly. Except, instead of a wall, it is Michelle. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/reverse t-shirt]
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View user profile http://www.last.fm/user/Teh_Jakester/
Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:23 pm

Mission 113: You Gave Me Something That I Didn't Have but Had No Use [Bathroom Guard]
"if you let me into the bathroom i'll be your best friend" "i doubt that; you didn't even know that today was my birthday" "what yes i totally did" "then where's my present" "it's IN THE BATHROOM" "wait how could you have gotten into the bathroom if i never let you in" "IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SURPRISE" "i don't know what you're trying to pull here but just stop it" "damn" Jakey mopes off and bumps into Michelle. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/birthday t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:23 pm

Mission 114: I Was Too Weak to Give In [Bathroom Guard]
"hey bathroom guard you are totally guarding the wrong bathroom" Jakey motions to a sloppily-built second bathroom right next to the main bathroom. "oh sorry" The bathroom guard switches posts, and Jakey attempts to open the real bathroom door, which is locked. "SHIT" Jakey walks up to the bathroom guard. "hey can i use this bathroom" "no it is my duty to guard it" "SHIT" Michelle touches the new bathroom's wall, causing it to collapse. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/build t-shirt]
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View user profile http://www.last.fm/user/Teh_Jakester/
Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:24 pm

Mission 115: Too Strong to Lose [Bathroom Guard]
"since you will not let me into that bathroom i am forced to call your mummy" "oh no not my mummy" "hello, mrs. bathroom guard? yes your son is not letting me into this bathroom uh-huh uh-huh thank you ma'am" Jakey hangs up the phone. "she congratulates you on the great job you are doing" "oh how thoughtful" Jakey dusts off his hands and walks away. "wait shit" Michelle dusts off her hands and walks away. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/mummy t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:24 pm

Mission 116: My Heart is Under Arrest Again, but I Break Loose [Bathroom Guard]
"TEACHER BATHROOM GUARD ISN'T LETTING ME INTO THE BATHROOM" "detention for disrupting class" "aw" "detention for talking back" "shit" "detention for swearing" Michelle stamps her foot. "detention for not taking me home"
[reward: respect +/detention]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:24 pm

Mission 117: My Head is Giving Me Life or Death, but I Can't Choose [Bathroom Guard]
"hey can you not let un-me not enter the un-bathroom" "no" "okay then can not-you un-let not-me un-enter the non-bathroom" "yes" "DAMMIT" Michelle wanders up to Jakey. "don't take not-me home"
[reward: respect +/not-t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:24 pm

Mission 118: I Swear I'll Never Give In [Bathroom Guard]
"DEAR KING BRAN I AM APALLED BY THIS NATION'S BATHROOM GUARDS PLEASE MAKE THEM LESS GOOD" Jakey affixes a stamp to his letter and mails it off to the king. "JUST YOU WAIT BATHROOM GUARD; YOU WILL HAVE YOUR COMEUPPANCE" Michelle shoves a large letter to Santa into the mailbox. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/letter t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:24 pm

Mission 119: I Refuse [Bathroom Guard]
"bathroom guard we are here on behalf of the king" "no you can't get in" "you are fired" "WHAT" "and we are replacing you with this man" The guard walks off, dejected. "yo new guard can i use the bathroom" The new bathroom guard picks Jakey up, snaps him in half, and chucks him out of the building. Michelle walks up to the broken mass of Jakey lying in the street and pokes him with a stick. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/New Bathroom Guard missions]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:24 pm

Mission 120: Has Someone Taken Your Faith? [New Bathroom Guard]
"kathy you have to fire the new guard" "but he's doing such a great job" "but he broke in half" "so?" "and i found this in his locker" Jakey hands Kathy an issue of Kathy Magazine with the name "Kathy" crossed out and the words "dumb bitch" written in with permanent marker, and in Jakey's handwriting. "THE NERVE OF THAT GUY" Kathy rolls up her sleeve and stomps over to the new guard. "you're fired" "aw" The new guard slumps off, and the old guard takes his place. "wait shit" Michelle walks out of the Kathy magazine printing room with a permanent marker. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/Bathroom Guard missions]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:25 pm

Mission 121: It's Real; the Pain You Feel [Bathroom Guard]
"i have gotten 150 signatures on this petition to let me into the bathroom" The guard takes Jakey's clipboard and looks through the signatures. "these are all in the same handwriting and are various misspellings of 'jakey'" "i don't see your point" The guard hands Jakey back his clipboard. "no admittance" "fuck" Jakey chucks his clipboard into the trash, and Michelle appears with a petition. "hello i am collecting signatures for this petition that says for you to take me home
[reward: respect +/petition t-shirt]
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View user profile http://www.last.fm/user/Teh_Jakester/
Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:25 pm

Mission 122: The Life, the Love You'd Die to Heal [Bathroom Guard]
"bathroom guard i am here to embarass you in front of your girlfriend, kathy" "what she's not my-" Jakey splashes a glass of water on the bathroom guard's crotch. "NOW LOOK AND LAUGH" Kathy stares at Jakey blankly before walking off. "CURSES" Michelle runs up to Jakey carrying a glass of water, but trips and spills it all over Jakey's crotch. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/glass of water t-shirt]
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View user profile http://www.last.fm/user/Teh_Jakester/
Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:25 pm

Mission 123: The Hope That Starts the Broken Hearts [Bathroom Guard]
"heh heh" Jakey crashes a wrecking ball into the wall of the bathroom, creating a giant hole. Jakey then races to the guard. "GUARD GUARD SOMEONE BLEW A HOLE IN THE BATHROOM WALL" "nice try; i am not falling for that" "drat" Jakey mopes off to return the wrecking ball to the construction site. Michelle swings back and forth on the ball. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/wrecking t-shirt]
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Jakeyadventure
apple computers


Male
Number of posts : 7687
Age : 23
Favourite Band : Nirvana
Registration date : 2007-12-29

PostSubject: Re: Nothing (2006)   Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:25 pm

Mission 124: You Trust, You Must Confess [Bathroom Guard]
"can i please use the bathroom" "okay" The guard hands Jakey the key, and a single tear streams down Jakey's face as he enters the bathroom. Michelle stands in the shower, embarassed. "take me home"
[reward: respect +/No Soap, t-shirt/Jakey missions]
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Nothing (2006)
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