This week, Entertainment Weekly released their list of the 100 greatest FILMS, TELEVISION SHOWS, ALBUMS, AND NOVELS
Since I don't really give a shit about NOVELS, I will be criticising their shit for the other three. I'll post the TOP TEN, then every other one I've experienced after that.
There are A BUNCH of films I know the gist of (Citizen Kane, The Godfather, King Kong, 2001, etc.), but haven't seen.
01: Citizen Kane
02: The Godfather
04: Bonnie and Clyde
06: It's a Wonderful Life
It's a Wonderful Life was okay. I can't judge it very well because I saw things that ripped it off before I saw the actual film. It's kind of a slow starter, but it's a very nice movie regardless. It's on every Hanukkah, so.
07: Mean Streets
08: The Gold Rush
10: Gone with the Wind
19: Pulp Fiction
I plan to see this someday, so WATCH THIS SPACE
22: Toy Story
THE SINGLE GREATEST FILM IN HISTORY
ALL OF MY NOSTALGIA
I REFUSE TO CALL ANY FILM BETTER THAN IT
28: The Wizard of Oz
It's been many, many years, but I remember one thing I love about this movie. When Dorothy is in Kansas, the film is in black and white. When she gets to Oz, it's in full colour. This touch makes the movie for me, even if I can't remember a single other thing about it.
43: The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
Let's be serious, here. Return of the King was the worst of the trilogy. That isn't to say it was unsatisfying, though. It was a great movie, but was the worst.
The Fellowship of the Ring was the best one. It felt more like a new adventure. The places were all new and mysterious; even the two elven cities felt completely different. The balrog remains the most impressive part of the trilogy. Plus, Gandalf was so much cooler when he was grey.
The Two Towers takes second place wholly because of the Battle of Helms Deep. It's the most impressive battle scene in the trilogy, and felt right.
51: A Hard Day's Night
Great choice here. A Hard Day's Night is objectively the best of The Beatles' films. The humour is spot-on, from John convincing a fan that he looks nothing like himself to Paul asking a passenger about the whereabouts of his ball.
The only flaw is the lack of closure on the ball issue.
53: Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back
I agree with this being the best in the saga. Hoth, Dagobah, and Cloud City all feel completely different and unique, and it never lingers in one place for too long. If I had to honestly rate all six movies, I'd say V > IV > VI > III > II > I. I'm not very unique here.
I will say, though, in defense of the prequels, they had some pretty cool moments. I loved the podrace in I, and the Coruscant chase and Geonosis arena in II were cool. III had a lot of stupid moments, but it was still okay. If you could take the good moments from the prequels and surround them with writing that ISN'T terrible, you'd have a great trilogy. OH WAIT YOU'D BE REPLACING 95% OF IT
88: The Dark Knight
I can't decide if I prefer this or Batman Begins. I will say that I prefer Katie Holmes over her replacement, though.
Despite Bale's Batman voice being way too over-the-top and silly, The Dark Knight is an outstanding film. I can't really say anything bad about it. I just sort of wish I hadn't known who Harvey Dent was before watching it so I could have been surprised about him becoming Twoface.
My television-watching is suspect.
01: The Wire
02: The Simpsons
I've been rewatching The Simpsons lately. Without a doubt, it is the best series I've ever seen if you ignore the last 10+ seasons
Lately, I've noticed how well-written the characters are before the SEASONS THAT DON'T EXIST. Mr. Burns is, without a doubt, the best character, but Homer, Bart, Marge, Moe, Apu, Skinner, Milhouse, Sideshow Bob, and any character voiced by Phil Hartman are all brilliant.
I've actually grown to appreciate Marge's character. She's very consistent and human. She's not perfect, and is often wrong. Lisa, however, is all over the map. She's condescending about violence one minute, then laughing at a cartoon mouse disemboweling a cartoon cat.
Overall, though, the series has many amazing moments and characters, and is DEFINITELY WORTH THE REWATCHING I AM GIVING IT
04: The Mary Tyler Moore Show
05: The Sopranos
06: All in the Family
07: The Andy Griffith Show
08: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
THIS IS MY MOTHER'S FAVOURITE SHOW
It is very campy, and I'm not sure I like it. I may be jaded, though.
09: Mad Men
10: Your Show of Shows
I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU
WHEN THE RAIN STARTS TO FALL
I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU
IF YOU'RE THERE FOR ME, TOO
27: Monty Python's Flying Circus
Okay, so I've only seen scattered sketches, but goddamn this shit is great. Why are the British the best at everything?
49: The Muppet Show
WHEN I WAS A CHILD THIS WAS GREAT
SHAME IT'S NOT SESAME STREET
53: American Idol
Last season of American Idol was shit. There were no good contestants, but only because the judges actively sabotaged the males.
But, yeah, David Cook, what a guy.
65: Doctor Who
It's okay. There's certainly worse.
87: South Park
To be absolutely fair, South Park is currently better than The Simpsons. But, of course, this statement means nothing.
South Park is a good show, but I definitely prefer The Simpsons. Maybe I haven't given it enough time, though.
OH BOY HERE WE GO
01: The Beatles/"Revolver"
Fuck you. HEY GUYS LET'S MAKE THEIR WORST ALBUM THE BEST ALBUM EVER
Revolver has some great tracks, sure. Got to Get You Into My Life, For No One, I'm Only Sleeping, And Your Bird Can Sing, yeah, okay. But fuck you if you think shit like Tomorrow Never Knows and Love You To are worth anything.
02: Prince/"Purple Rain"
03: The Rolling Stones/"Exile on Main Street"
OVERBLOWN AND NOT VERY GOOD AT ALL
04: Michael Jackson/"Thriller"
ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD
BUT HUMAN NATURE IS AN IRREDEEMABLE PIECE OF SHIT
05: The Clash/"London Calling"
06: Bob Dylan/"Blood on the Tracks"
07: Aretha Franklin/"Lady Soul"
08: Kanye West/"My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy"
09: The Beach Boys/"Pet Sounds"
IN UTERO IS BETTER
I'LL ACCEPT IT
12: The Beatles/"The White Album"
MORE LIKE THEIR BEST ALBUM
13: Marvin Gaye/"What's Going On"
14: Johnny Cash/"At Folsom Prison"
15: Bruce Springsteen/"Born to Run"
REALLY GOOD ACTUALLY
20: The Rolling Stones/"Beggar's Banquet"
THE BEST OF THEIR ALBUMS
FUCK YOU IF YOU THINK DIFFERENTLY
22: The Beatles/"Abbey Road"
BETTER THAN REVOLVER IN EVERY CONCEIVABLE WAY
23: U2/"Achtung Baby"
LIKE I REMEMBER IT
U2'S ALBUMS ALL SOUND LIKE
26: The Jimi Hendrix Experience/"Are You Experienced?"
... seriously? At least it's better than Electric Ladyland.
BUT AXIS: BOLD AS LOVE IS BETTER
27: Bob Dylan/"Highway 61 Revisited"
32: Guns N' Roses/"Appetite for Destruction"
33: The Wu-Tang Clan/"Enter the Wu-Tang"
I FOUND IT BORING
BUT IT'S NOT MY GENRE
34: David Bowie/"The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars"
BUT HUNKY DORY IS BETTER
35: The Rolling Stones/"Some Girls"
ACTUALLY ONE OF THEIR BETTER ALBUMS AS I RECALL
BUT FUCK YOU STILL
37: Pink Floyd/"The Dark Side of the Moon"
ACTUALLY REALLY GOOD
SHOULD BE HIGHER
39: The Who/"Who's Next"
40: John Lennon/"Plastic Ono Band"
SHOULD BE #1, OBJECTIVELY
THE EMOTION LENNON PUT INTO THIS SHIT IS UNMATCHED
42: AC/DC/"Back in Black"
45: Radiohead/"OK Computer"
OUTCLASSED BY IN RAINBOWS, KID A, THE BENDS, ETC.
46: The Beatles/"Rubber Soul"
Often referred to as 'Revolver pt. 1', Rubber Soul is INFINITELY SUPERIOR YOU STUPID FUCKS
47: The Cure/"Disintegration"
ONE OF THE WORST THINGS I HAVE HEARD IN MY ENTIRE LIFE
50: The Smiths/"The Queen is Dead"
I REALLY LIKED IT
54: R.E.M./"Life's Rich Pageant"
REALLY GOOD ONE OF THEIR BEST
59: Metallica/"Master of Puppets"
62: The Replacements/"Let it Be"
63: Television/"Marquee Moon"
DID I ACTUALLY LISTEN TO THIS
OR AM I JUST IMAGINING IT
I DON'T REMEMBER
64: Nine Inch Nails/"The Downward Spiral"
PRETTY OKAY BUT NOWHERE NEAR THE TOP 100
65: Love/"Forever Changes"
I REMEMBER LISTENING TO THIS
AND... LIKING IT?
I EITHER LIKED IT OR I HATED IT
I CAN'T REMEMBER
68: Public Enemy/"It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back"
69: Sonic Youth/"Daydream Nation"
OR DID I LIKE IT
I CAN'T REMEMBER
70: The Stooges/"Raw Power"
THEIR ONLY GOOD ALBUM
IT'S REALLY GOOD THOUGH
71: The Kinks/"The Village Green Preservation Society"
LIKE EVERYTHING THEY DID
75: Elvis Costello/"My Aim is True"
SHAME THE NEXT TWO ARE SHIT
77: My Bloody Valentine/"Loveless"
79: Led Zeppelin/"Old Man Carrying a Bundle of Sticks"
REALLY GREAT BUT II IS THEIR BEST
80: Elton John/"Goodbye, Yellow Brick Road"
DID I LISTEN TO THIS ONE
IF I DID I LIKED IT
BUT BENNIE AND THE JETS FUCKING SUCKS
82: Pavement/"Slanted and Enchanted"
GENERIC-SOUNDING AND KIND OF BORING
89: Sleater-Kinney/"Dig Me Out"
Honestly, this is the single worst thing I have EVER listened to. If anyone thinks it's good, they are LEGITIMATELY retarded. Fuck you.
90: The White Stripes/"White Blood Cells"
TOP TEN FOR ME
91: Sly and the Family Stone/"There's a Riot Goin' On"
98: Queens of the Stone Age/"Songs for the Deaf"
NO ONE KNOWS AND MOSQUITO SONG ARE THE ONLY SONGS TO WRITE HOME ABOUT
SOUNDS THE SAME
IT'S SOOOOOOOOOO BORING